“THE DAY HAS come to take an accounting of my life. Have I dreamed of late of the person I want to be, of the changes I would make in my daily habits, in the way I am with others, in the friendship I show companions, woman friends, man friends, my partner, my parents? I have remained enchained too often to less that what I am. But the day has come to take an accounting of my life,” (On Wings of Awe).
We recently entered the Jewish month of Elul, and Jews began preparations for the High Holy Days of Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur.
We spend time in self reflection on how we have lived our lives in the past year and how we would like to change in the future.
Like the practice in the secular new year of making resolutions on Jan. 1, we often end up sliding back into old habits, sometimes in a matter of days.
These holy days remind us that we have another chance.
The theme of Yom Noraim, the Days of Awe, is teshuva, which means “return” or “repentance.”
We strive to return to a more holy life, to God, and to who we really are … beings who have the holy spark of the Dvine within us, just waiting to emerge.
Rosh HaShanah, literally the “head” of the year, is a joyous, celebratory day when the ram’s horn is blown and we reflect on the sweetness of the coming year.
Ten days later, Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year, arrives.
It is a somber time of fasting and prayer when we ask God for forgiveness for our past sins.
The word for sin in Hebrew is “chet,” which simply means missing the mark.
There is no concept of original sin in Judaism since we are born innocent and need no redemption.
The mistakes we make come from our poor choices, not because we are inherently sinful.
When we fall short, we need no intermediary but turn directly to God for forgiveness.
There are many customs around preparing for the new Jewish year, one of which is the daily study of Psalm 27 throughout the month of Elul.
The psalm, attributed to David, expresses a reliance on God amidst enemies and adversity, which would have reflected the difficult periods in David’s life.
It begins with the words, “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?”
Psalm 27 moves from themes of the surety of divine protection to a soulful expression of need and a wish to always dwell in God’s presence.
Throughout our lives we face not only joyous times but periods of adversity.
Studying this psalm teaches us how to navigate these ups and downs, all while maintaining a steadfast faith in God.
It is during this time that we are expected to go to those we have wronged and ask for forgiveness.
We don’t ask God to forgive us for something we have done to another person.
We cannot pray to God to absolve us of our wrongdoings affecting others.
We must do that hard work ourselves.
Another aspect of making amends is to forgive others.
We often have trouble letting go of the hurts we have suffered from their words or actions, ruminating on the pain they have caused us.
Sometimes it’s even harder to forgive ourselves. We tend to focus on how things could have been if we had acted differently.
Letting go is a liberating process, allowing us to move on with our lives.
“In the end what matters most is how well did you love, how well did you live, how well did you learn to let go,” (Dalai Lama).
As the 26 hours of prayer and fasting on Yom Kippur come to an end, the imagery is of heaven’s gates beginning to close.
There is a sense of urgency, and we pray with increasing intensity so as to make sure our voices are heard and we are forgiven before the gates slam shut.
Of course, we know that they never really close, but it is a powerful image.
The day ends with one long blast of the ram’s horn, and we feel a sense of release flowing through us.
As the Day of Atonement ends, we have a feeling of “at-one-ment” with God and all of humanity.
May you be blessed with a sweet year. Kein yehi ratzon … may it be God’s will. Shalom.
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Issues of Faith is a rotating column by religious leaders on the North Olympic Peninsula. Suzanne DeBey is a lay leader of the Port Angeles Jewish community. Her email is debeyfam@olympus.net.
